in the train (6:50pm 30 july 2006)

with nafisa, handed her anne frank to read and have ctach-22 (joseph heller) with myself.

the scenario.
the trains moving north from where i sit. my right side neighbours the window. it is raining outside so the window's shut.
general comparment therefore the window doesn't shut completely. i can feel this thin line of cold air constantly pushing on my right arm skin.

nafisa's listening to music as she sits opposite of me and is reading the book. she seems to have read quite a few pages of it and i havnt gotten anywhere beyond the first page of the first chapter as yet.

i am restless to tell u abt this man in the cmptmnt who got on from lonavala station. he's talking to himself loudly and singing really odd songs pretty loudly. the door or the carriage is open and he's standing there doing his act. all runs through my head is tht he myt jump off or smthn. very interesting.

he's also screaming at non-existent people. 'kya re?' and lots more of marathi. basically just asking questions to the non-existing. the seat beside me is empty, i'm afraid he'll sit next to me...

i can really laugh at myself right now for thinking that way. but im still scared too. haha (7:00pm)

oh now i just realised. he's singing songs frm 'tere naam'. i didn;t know that people actually lost it after watchin tht silly movie. haha

painter-writer

Feeling a little saner now. Very upset about leaving this place. I am leaving for Pune once agn. I wish I were staying here for my studies. I do know that I can’t at least till this year is over. I miss this place more than Dubai. Yes I do get homesick all the time.

Sometimes I feel miserable. The writer has once agn awoken within me. Let’s see what comes around next. The painter is stifled inside.

The painter.
Needs to escape.
Wants to run away.
Has to stay calm.
Is the most restless.
Does not get any empty canvas.
I think the painter should try being an artist now.
Envies the writer.

The writer.
Has something going on every second.
Is becoming more efficient at what he does.
Has many ways to go.
Is at work.
Will always be at work.
Seems to be taking over the painter.
Gets inspiration from the painter.

at yasir's

i have more than just lost it. it is far more than clear that i have completely drained my brains in the wild mumbai rains today. some of my brains (left in the reserve) are going to be drained in the trip to pune tomorrow. i havent done even one of my assignments (i am so screwed)

my physical and mental health seems to be deteriorating by each second. i think nothing, laugh at everything under the sun, attend all my classes, eat vegetarian all day without complaining, hardly get time to write my diary, eat chocolate, these are the things that prove how bad my mental health is.

there is nothing more to say.
me and yasir played sniper-sniper* last night.
is there anything worse to show to you to prove how much the mental capabilities of young adults is deteriorating?


*we were basically sitting at his ghar ka window and strategizing how to kill and/or blow up vehicles that passed by on the road that we could see from there.

we assassinated 4 innocent common men with one (just one) bullet.

we also did assassinate the night-guard of the bus depot. the bus authorities shall be bearing alot of expenditure over getting a new one as the one we killed was an able dissappearble albino. (he was rather entertaining)


the (disappearable) albino guard